Hungry Hungry Hippo

Before our Sadester was born, I was set on my decision to breastfeed. It's free, easy, and said to be healthiest for your baby. My daughter is almost 5 months old now and I'm still going strong. Free and healthy it may be. But easy? Not exactly.

All mother's experiences are different, just as all babies are different. While pregnant, I naively envisioned myself holding our daughter in my arms, her happily nursing while looking up at me lovingly, ending with her drifting off to sleep, drunk on milk. Pah! I had the receiving blanket pulled over my eyes on that one.

First of all, Sadie has ants in her pants too! She inherited my twitchiness. My bad. I wouldn't change a thing about her, and love her more for it, but boy oh boy is she a wiggly one. Sometimes it feels like I'm feeding a whole litter of piglets.

While nursing, Sadie's limbs just keep on moving, as if she's conducting an orchestra with both hands and feet. She plays my boobies like a pair bongo drums (and she's shockingly good!). Her new favorite maneuver is placing her foot underneath my armpit, kicking as hard as she can, and launching herself off my lap. She also has a death grip on my bra strap at all times, so if in the event she DOES fall asleep while feeding, she'll know the second I try to place her in her crib. She's a smart cookie. A little too smart.

Our little monkey is curious too. (Mmmm milk, milk, milk, DOG, milk milk, milk, DADDY, milk, milk, TV, milk, milk, milk, DOG). She'll turn her head around like a baby owl at any noise or movement, making it hard for her to focus at the task at hand.

Then there's me. I figured I'd be a natural milk machine. A regular Holstein, if you will. If she suckles, it will come? Nope. I have to work at making sure I produce enough. I pump on the side to stimulate production and have tried every lactogenic food I've heard of. I thought brewers yeast was the answer! Turns out it just gave Sadie (and myself) a bad case of gas. Sorry Robin...

Some women choose to breastfeed, some women don't, and some women simply can't. I respect them all! But at the end of the day, I'm happy I'm able to breastfeed, albeit a bit of a gong show, and I know Sadie loves me for my efforts.

Ok. Time to go feed my Hungry Hungry Hippo.

Birthdays, Babies, Brewskies, And Breastpumps

So my husband is originally from Ontario, myself, a born and raised Bluenoser. We lived in Toronto for 5 years or so, but when I found out I was pregnant, I WANTED MY MOMMY and we moved back to my hometown of Halifax.

My husband's parents came to visit us this past weekend and what a weekend it was. Unlike the typical wife/in-law relationship, I genuinely adore them both. I also love hosting visitors, as it allows me to be a tourist in my own city (just as having a baby allows me to be a tourist in my own life? Ah so...). Our Sadester was delightfully cooperative and let us drag her through a smorgasbord of family dinners, hikes, and activities over the course of the weekend.

We did, however, leave her home for an evening (big shout out to you, Nana Jan!) so my husband's parents could treat us to his birthday dinner chez The Bicycle Thief (voted best new restaurant in The Coast). We sipped on amazing wine, feasted on beautiful Italian food, and chatted about parenthood. Fantastico! The dinner was followed by an after-drink with some friends at the upstairs bar of The Henry House. It was the cat's pajamas. No seriously, I ordered a drink called the Cat's Pajamas. A sweet, citrusy, gin cocktail served in a china teacup. Lately my drink of choice has been water, served in a stream from the kitchen tap directly into my mouth, so this was a step up for me. We then had an after, after drink at Bearly's House Of Blues where I showed my in-laws how us East Coasters dance. 3am rolled around and they were dancing circles around me!

Now I don't want members of La Leche League to come beat down my door and kick me in the baby-maker, so I'll note that I had fridge full of pre-pumped, uncontaminated breast milk to feed my darling Sadie. We don't want her sipping on White Russians just yet.

But alas, our wonderful weekend is over and we're back to our usual routine. Sadie may not know it just yet, but she has 2 sets of wonderful grandparents who are madly in love with her. She also has a set of parents who think she's pretty alright too.

Revenge Is Best Served Hard-Boiled

Dear little shit birds who insist on egging our house,

Let me start by saying that my husband and I are good people. We say good morning to you as you walk by us on your way to school. We slow down the car and swerve around you during your road hockey games. Heck, we even gave out amazing Halloween treats this year, just so you'd think we were cool neighbors. So why, I ask you, do you feel the need to repeatedly egg our house? What have we done to deserve such punishment?

I understand you're young, and feel the need to rebel against your elders. However, you must understand that your eggs are hitting our daughter's window, waking her from the sleep it took us 2 hours to attain.

Now I'm a reasonable woman, with a "que sera" type of attitude, but if I catch you throwing eggs at our humble home again I WILL hunt you down. I will make you eat the carton of raw eggs I've set aside for you, shell and all, and you will like it.

Sincerely,

Your worst nightmare

The Martin Skorcheesies

At around month 5 of my pregnancy, the cravings took hold. I woke up every morning and made my first breakfast (egg, tomato, cheese, and avocado bagel-wich) followed by my second breakfast an hour later (egg, tomato, cheese, and avocado bagel-wich). At night, I couldn't sleep unless I had my sweet fix. This is when I discovered the wonderful world of baking.

My goal was to find recipes that satisfied my endless hunger (ME WANT COOKIE), and to provide my husband with something to nibble on too. I've always had a weakness for cheesecake, and Robin is a big fan of Skor bars... 

Light bulb! The Martin Skorcheesies were born. 

Recipe: 

- 1 8oz package of softened cream cheese

- 1/2 cup of softened butter (don't skimp with margarine or I'll slap you on the wrist)

- 1 tsp of vanilla

- 2 cups of icing sugar

- 1 bag of Skor Toffee Bits

- 1 bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips (for dipping)

Instructions: 

 - hire a babysitter for the afternoon

 - mix the first 5 ingredients into a bowl (keep 1/4 cup of Skor Bits aside for decoration)

- chill the mixture in the fridge for an hour

- roll into bite-sized balls and place them on wax paper

- place balls in the freezer for 15 minutes to firm (tee hee)

- place chocolate chips into a small metal bowl, then place the bowl in a pot of boiling water

- stir the chips until they are completely melted

- dip the balls in chocolate (get your minds out of the gutter) using a small, metal spoon, then place them on wax paper

- sprinkle some Skor Bits on top

- place them in the fridge or freezer to set and store

- use your willpower not to eat the whole batch

You're welcome.

Live Long (in the moment) And Prosper

I had an "aha" moment this morning while drinking my first cup o' joe. In fact, most of my clear thoughts these days are fueled by the sweet, sweet nectar of caffeine. I thought hard about what kind of mommy I am now, and what kind of mommy I want to be. Deep thoughts for 5am, eh?

I suppose I am considered to be a zany, non-traditional parent. I was tsked at while breastfeeding in the park one day, not because my feedbags were exposed, but because was telling my daughter to "EAT DA BOOBIE". When Sadie is being loud, I ask her to kindly "shut her pie hole". Probably not the best thing to teach your child, as I can already see her kindergarten teacher cracking up as our daughter politely asks her fellow classmate to "please, shut his pie hole". So I'm a bit coo-coo bananas. What mother isn't? At least Sadie will grow up with a sense of humor.

But back to my "aha" moment. After thinking about ways I can improve my parenting skills, I came to the most important one of all. To live, and to parent, in the moment.

My husband and I nostalgically reminisce about our daughter's her first few weeks on this planet. How small and cuddly she was (not to mention immobile and quiet!). These days she has more ants in her pants than I do and has a problem controlling THE VOLUME OF HER VOICE. We also find ourselves anxiously awaiting the days when Sadie can crawl, walk, talk, get a job, etc. I know it's important to reflect on your hatchling's journey and encourage him/her to develop, but now I'm trying my very best to stop and smell the roses...er...baby poop. I want to enjoy each and every moment with our Sadester. As you know, they grow up so fricken' fast.

So tomorrow morning while Sadie is snapping both of my bra straps simultaneously with her hand and foot, I will urge myself to be in the moment and smile. She is perfect now, and everyday is my favorite Sadie day.

My Daughter: The Baby Dumbbell

An upside to my inherent twitchiness is the drive to be fit. Just prior to my pregnancy, I was in the best shape of my life. I ran, played oodles of volleyball, and considered myself a bit of a gym rat. Now, 4 months after our daughter was born, I'm finally at my pre-pregnancy weight. Now it's a matter of getting back into pre-pregnancy shape. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a MILF, am I right?

Alas! This is easier said than done. Having a baby does scary things to your body. Carrying a 9 pound bundle of joy in your kangaroo pouch splits your abdominal muscles clean apart. The result is a stomach that resembles something out of a Dali painting. My mother once told me she lost a bar of soap between these muscles right after I was born. This was not exactly the case for me, but you get the picture. More importantly, who has the time to work out when you're home all day raising a baby?

So without further adieu, I present to you...

The Baby Dumbbell Workout Plan!

The moves:


 - Bjorn Lunges & Squats

   - Baby Bicep Curls

 - Upright Baby Rows

* Be certain your baby is happy, safe, and conscious while performing the moves above. I once did a set of Baby Bicep Curls, unknowingly of the fact that Sadie was fast asleep with drool dripping on the floor. Oopsy!

- Crunches
- Double leg lifts
- Push ups
- Pelvic raises

* Bust out the moves above as quickly as possible while your baby is playing safely in his/her exersaucer, swing, etc.

Be sure to include some cardio into your week too. I love to walk and run with Sadie. We have a top-of-the-line MEC BOB Revolution stroller that is great for sidewalks and trails. (Big shout out to our friends in Toronto for this amazing gift!).

Well, someone's done napping. Time to throw her in the Bjorn and get my sweat on.

Ciao!

Flawless Victory!

I read pregnancy books out the wazoo, and heard bajillions of horror stories about labor, but nothing prepared me for what was to come...

It wasn't that bad at all!


Sarah's recipe for an easy, breezy labor:
- 1 belly full of abdominal muscles prior to pregnancy
- 5 heaping piles of motivation to maintain abdominal muscles throughout pregnancy
- 1 calm and motivating partner
- 2 lovely nurses
- 1 perfectly administered epidural
- 1 serious bout of "the giggles" (I tend to be giddy when I'm nervous)
- 1 hefty dose of "I'm gunna get this baby outta me NOW!"
Yields 1, 9 pound, healthy baby

Don't get me wrong. I'm not belittling the labor process. Heck, I took the easy way out with an epidural. I just want all of the mamas-to-be out there with fears of "the big day" to fear not! It may not be that bad after all.